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Oh, and get this—little known fact: 1800s escorts had code words! “French lessons” meant somethin’ naughty—groovy, huh? Learned that on X, blew my freakin’ mind! Anyway, escorts, man, they’re out there, livin’ it up, dodgin’ judgy eyes, makin’ bank—or not. Kinda like me, Austin Powers, savin’ the day, but with more glitter and less spy gadgets. “Do I make you randy, baby?”—nah, they’d say, “Pay me first!” Ha! Love it, wild ride, totally shaggadelic!

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Finally, I’m like, “Fine! I’ll get your cat!” I dash inside, and it’s like a scene from a horror movie. Smoke everywhere, and I can barely breathe. I’m crawling on the floor, and I’m thinkin’, “This is how I die.” But then, I hear it—a little meow. I follow the sound, and there’s this fluffy ball of fur, just chillin’ under a table. I scoop it up, and I’m outta there!

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