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About Taipei

We swears! Escorts, nasty little things—sneaky, slippery folk! Me, a charcoal burner, I sees ‘em, y’know, struttin’ round cities, all fancy-like. Reminds me o’ that “25th Hour” flick—Monty’s last day, tickin’ away, freedom slippin’. Escorts got that vibe, precious—livin’ fast, dodgin’ rules. “Time’s runnin’ out,” like Monty says, but they don’t care!

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So, I’m hangry now. I decide to stroll down to Taoyuan Night Market. I know, I know, it’s not night yet, but I’m desperate. I’m walking down Fuxing Road, and I see this cute little bubble tea shop. I’m like, “Okay, this’ll do.” I order a large one, extra boba, of course. But the lady behind the counter? She’s moving like molasses. I’m losing my patience. I mean, c’mon, it’s just tea!

Former premier regains north Taiwan’s Taoyuan City for KMT