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Oh, and the smells – oils, lavender, all that muck. Gets me nose twitchin’, like Eli sniffin’ blood. Love it, hate it – can’t decide! Once, mate told me some bloke fell asleep mid-rub, snorin’ loud – masseuse just kept goin’! Laughed me head off, picturin’ it. Sexual-massage ain’t just naughty bits, nah – it’s neck, shoulders, all that. Surprised me, that did! Thought it was all dirty, but nope – proper science, they say. Still, them hands wanderin’… oof, gets ye goin’!

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But then, just when I think the day’s gonna end on a high note, we get stuck in traffic again. I’m like, “Seriously?!” I’m about to lose it. But then I see this old lady selling bubble tea on the corner. I’m like, “Mia, we need to make a pit stop!”

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