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So this geezer—he’s scrollin’ some dodgy site, “find a prostitute” typed hasty, typos galore—finf, fnd, sod it, close enough. Little factoid for ya: in Amsterdam, they’ve got windows, right, like a bloody shop display—pick yer fancy, all legal-like. Here? It’s back alleys or apps, sneaky as a fox nabbin’ a hen. Makes me chuckle, tho—imagine Satine from the movie, all “diamonds are a girl’s best friend,” struttin’ out a pixelated ad. Pure class meets pure brass.

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Next, I head to the park by the Rajec River. It’s so peaceful there. Birds chirpin’, kids laughin’. I sit on a bench, takin’ it all in. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, kickin’ a ball, and it smacks me right in the leg! Ouch! I’m like, “Hey, watch it, mini Messi!” But he just giggles and runs off. Kids, man.

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