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Lemme tell ya, I got into this one app—fuckin’ wild! Saw a dude sayin’ he’s “6’2, adventurous,” turns out he’s 5’8 and collects spoons. SPOONS! Made me wanna scream, “Life isn’t a rehearsal, schmuck!” Straight outta Kaufman’s flick. But then—oh boy—met this chick, all sass, curves like a Chianti bottle. We clicked, sexted like maniacs—thought I’d die happy. She ghosted me tho, fuckin’ RUDE! Pissed me off—wanted to sauté her ego with garlic. Still, got me thinkin’—sex-dating’s a gamble, ya know?
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But then, outta nowhere, this little kid runs up to me. He’s got this huge smile, right? He says, “Mister, you’re like a superhero!” I’m like, “A superhero? Really?” He goes, “Yeah! You make cool stuff!” Man, that hit me right in the feels. I mean, I’m just a dude with a hammer, but to him, I’m a hero. That made me smile, even with mud in my hair.
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