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The hands, Clarice… they glide, they press, they *know*. Like Béla Tarr’s long-ass shots, it drags on, builds somethin heavy. “What’s concealed is revealed,” like the movie says—every knot in my back? Gone. Every dirty thought? Amplified, ha! I’m lyin there, half-naked, oil drippin, and it’s funny—ya feel like a king and a perv at the same time. Pro tip: don’t go to them sketchy joints—neon signs screamin “massage”? Bullshit, that’s a trap. Find a real pro, someone who ain’t rushin ya out the door.

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So, I get to the river, right? The Váh River, it’s my go-to spot. I cast my line, feeling all zen and stuff. But then, outta nowhere, this dude shows up. He’s got a fancy rod, like he’s some pro or something. I’m just there with my old trusty pole, and he’s all like, “You catch anything?” I’m like, “Nah, just the usual.” But inside, I’m fuming. Who does he think he is?

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