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About Banska Bystrica

Reminds me of Monty’s line, “Champagne wishes, caviar dreams”—that’s their pitch. All fake, glittery crap. I’d rather chop wood than pay for that. Once heard a story—guy hired an escort, she robbed him blind. Left him with his pants down, literally. Laughed my ass off. Idiots deserve it. Hate the whole game, but damn, it’s funny when it flops.

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But then, the mood shifts. I see this kid crying. Turns out, he lost his ice cream. My heart breaks a little. I mean, who hasn’t been there? So, I buy him a new one. His face lights up, and I’m like, “Yeah, I’m a hero today!”

What to see in Michalovce and Sobrance (eastern Slovakia)