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I reckon it’s ancient, mate – way back, like, Egyptian times, they were rubbin’ oils on each other, callin’ it “healin’ touch.” Bullshit, right? More like “happy endin’ touch”! Makes me laugh, thinkin’ of some Pharaoh gettin’ frisky with scented oils. Little known fact – in Japan, they’ve got this thing, “nuru massage,” all slippery with seaweed gel. Seaweed! Who even thinks that up? Sounds like a wizard’s potion gone wrong, but damn, it’s slick as hell.

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So, I duck into this café on Špitálska. I’m dripping wet, looking like a drowned rat. The barista gives me a weird look, but I just order a coffee. I need caffeine to deal with this madness. While I’m waiting, I overhear some folks talking about the old castle ruins. Apparently, they’re haunted. Great, just what I need – ghosts on top of everything else!

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