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Now, I’m ramblin’—brain’s jumpin’ like a bad Skype call—but lemme say, it’s personal, y’know? One time, this masseuse, she’s whisperin’ some zen crap, I’m half-asleep, half—well, you get it. Made me laugh later—thought, “Larry, you old dog, still got it!” But serious, it’s not all sexy giggles—helps pain too. My back? Screwed from sittin’ 40 years. Erotic-massage fixed it—better than pills, cheaper than docs.

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So, I gear up, right? I’m all excited, but then I see this old guy on the bank. He’s yelling about something. Turns out, he lost his fishing rod. I’m like, “Dude, I’m not a fisherman. I’m a diver!” But he kept going on about how it was a family heirloom. I felt bad, but come on! I’m not diving for your rod, man!

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