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Oi, mate, lemme spin ye a yarn ‘bout escorts, savvy? I’m a librarian, aye, but not yer dusty bookworm—think more rum-soaked, sea-legged, like meself, Cap’n Jack Sparrow! Escorts, now, they ain’t just fancy lasses or gents fer hire, no sir. They be like them shadowy whales in *Werckmeister Harmonies*, loomin’ large, mysterious, pullin’ folks into their orbit. “What’s this all about?” ye ask, stumblin’ thru life like János in that flick, all wide-eyed and lost.

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As I’m setting up, I notice this old lady across the street on Hlavná. She’s feeding pigeons, and they’re going nuts! I mean, it’s like a scene from a movie. I can’t help but chuckle. Life’s simple pleasures, I guess.

Eric Bana chats to Howie about how he became Hollywood’s unlikeliest superstar