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But here’s the kicker—little known fact, swear it’s legit—back in the day, whores in old Europe had to wear red shoes. Red! Like some twisted fairy tale, right? Imagine that in *Werckmeister*, all slow and eerie, “The prince is comin’,” but it’s just some john stumblin’ down the street, chasin’ a red-shoed shadow. Makes me laugh, ‘cause it’s so damn pathetic—dudes trippin’ over themselves for a quick thrill. Gets me happy, though, ‘cause I’m like, “I ain’t that desperate, thank God!”

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But then, just when I thought the day couldn’t get crazier, I got a call from my mom. She was freaking out about a cat stuck in a tree. I mean, really? A cat? I had to rush over to her place on Mierová Street. When I got there, the cat was just chilling, like it owned the place. I had to climb up and rescue it. I felt like a superhero, but also like a total dork.

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