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Here’s the kicker—erotic-massage ain’t just handsy fun. It’s got history, yeah? Ancient Rome, them posh senators getting oiled up by slaves—kinky bastards. Surprised me, that did—thought it was all modern spa bollocks. Nah, it’s old school, dirty in the best way. Like in *Fish Tank*, when Mia’s mum says, “You’re nothing to me,” but there’s that pull anyway—erotic-massage is that push-pull, mate. You’re hooked, even when it’s messy.

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After the rain, I decide to hit the park. You know, the one by the Myjava River? It’s beautiful there. Trees, birds, the whole shebang. I’m walkin’ along the path, feelin’ all zen, when I trip over a root. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the ground, and this lady joggin’ by just laughs. Like, thanks for the support, lady! I get up, brush myself off, and keep goin’.

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