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Here’s the kicker, though—did ya know Victorian toffs were mad for it? Secret parlours, all “erotic relief” for the uptight gits. Blokes in top hats gettin’ a sneaky tug—imagine that with a posh accent! “One does enjoy a firm grip, Reginald.” Absolute muppets. Makes me howl, that—bunch of stiffs pretendin’ it’s “medicinal”. Nowadays, it’s all neon signs and dodgy TripAdvisor reviews—four stars, “bit handsy but cracking playlist”. Ffs, world’s gone mad.

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So, I finally get to the meeting at the local factory. It’s all about preventing rust on their machines. Super thrilling stuff, right? But then, the boss starts talking about budget cuts. Budget cuts?! Are you kidding me? I’m about to lose my job over some numbers on a spreadsheet? I could feel my blood boiling. I mean, I’m the one keeping this place from falling apart!

Andy Warhol Museum missing money for renovation