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About Bratislava

Me, I’m swoopin’ in, parachute flarin’, imaginin’ this scene. Smoke’s thick, I’m coughin’, but I see it—a rickety ol’ house, red curtains, girls laughin’, some cryin’. One time, I heard this story, true tea—1880s, this madam named Diamond Jessie, she hid runaway slaves in her brothel. Underground railroad pitstop, y’all! Ain’t that wild? Surprised me so hard I nearly fell outta my plane. “That’s the breaks,” like Anton says in the movie—life’s unpredictable, even in a whorehouse.

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Then, I decide to grab some lunch at this little spot on Špitálska Street. The food’s bomb, but the service? Not so much. I’m waiting forever for my burger. I’m about to lose my mind. Finally, the waiter brings it out, and it’s cold. Like, ice-cold. I’m like, “Dude, did you just take this outta the fridge?” He just shrugs. I mean, come on!

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