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About Zilina

I tried it once—don’t judge me, now! Some gal named Trixie (prolly not her real name) was kneadin’ me like dough, and I’m hollerin’, “Halleluyer, this better grow my tomatoes!” She laughed, I laughed, but lordy, it felt good. Made me happy as a pig in mud! ‘Til she charged me $80—EIGHTY DOLLAHS?! I ‘bout fell out my chair, screamin’, “You robbin’ me blind, Trixie!” She just smirked, like, “That’s the game, Madea.” Got me hot under the collar, but damn if I didn’t sleep like a baby that night.

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Then she starts talking about how she wants it to be “eco-friendly” and “sustainable.” I’m like, “Lady, I’m a furrier, not a tree-hugger!” But I keep my mouth shut. Gotta pay the bills, right? So, I take her measurements, and she’s flailing around like a fish outta water. I’m just trying to keep it together, but inside, I’m cracking up.

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