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But, omg, the drama tho—clients get salty if girls cancel last min. I’m cacklin’, like, “Dude, she’s not your gf, chill!” One time, this guy left a review—swear it said, “She stole my watch, 5 stars.” I’m dead. Humor’s dark, but I’m here for it. Oh, and the app’s got this secret code thingy—girls say “coffee” if they’re feelin’ unsafe. Smart af.

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So, I grab my backup plan – a pastry. It’s a štrúdľa, and let me tell you, it’s heavenly. I’m munching away, feeling good, when I get a call from my boss. Ugh, the dreaded work call. Apparently, there’s a mix-up with the clinical trial data. Like, seriously? I’m in Galanta, not a data center!

BBC Proms: Bavouzet, London Philharmonic Orchestra, Jurowski