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Here’s a kicker—didja know some cultures, like in Thailand, they’ve been twistin’ bodies into pretzels for centuries? Sexual-massage there’s an art—slow, steamy, leaves ya gobsmacked. Tried it once—well, Jill did, I just watched—don’t tell her I said that! Point is, it’s more’n just naughty bits—it’s connection, folks. “Toni Erdmann” gets it—awkward, messy, human stuff.

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Next, we hit the park by the river. It’s beautiful, right? Trees everywhere, kids playing, and I’m feeling good. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, and I trip over his skateboard. I go down hard. Like, faceplant hard. I’m lying there, and all I can think is, “Great, now I’m the clown of Chlmec.”

Driver picks the worst possible place to do a U-turn