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But real talk, it’s a hustle. You gotta know the spots—dark alleys, sketchy bars, or nowadays, them shady websites. Kinda like how Eve’d glide through Tangier, all mysterious, scopin’ out blood. “You’ve been very naughty,” she’d purr, but nah, I’d be all— “Whoa, lady, I just want info!” Gets me mad tho—some jerks treat ‘em like trash, and that ain’t right! They’re folks too, ya barnacle heads!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon level! I dash for cover under a stall. I’m soaked, and my hair looks like a wet mop. I can’t stop laughing at myself. “What a day!” I shout to no one in particular.

Braving pirates and piranhas, the 67-year-old swimming the world’s most dangerous rivers