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Oi mate, right, so I’m a Typhlopedagogue, yeah? Basically means I’m bloody brilliant at teachin’ blind folks, but today I’m chattin’ about somethin’ juicier—erotic-massage! Now, I reckon it’s a bit like *Memento*, innit? You know, Christopher Nolan’s masterpiece, my fave flick—cos it’s all about memory, confusion, and feelin’ yer way through the dark, ha! Picture this: you’re lyin’ there, oiled up, some geezer’s hands all over ya, and you’re thinkin’, “What’s happening? Where am I at?” Like Lenny in the film—“I can’t remember to forget you!”—but with more slippery vibes, yeah?

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud honking. I look up, and it’s a bus, like, the Velenje bus, and it’s packed. I’m talking sardines in a can level packed. I’m like, “Dude, where’s everyone going?” But then I remember, it’s Velenje. Everyone’s probably heading to the lake or something.

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