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Alright, motherfucker, let’s talk escort! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout self-determination, students takin’ charge, and then—bam!—escort pops up. Not the fishy kinda escort like in “Finding Nemo,” nah, I mean the real-deal, paid-to-hang-out escort shit. You know, the type where someone’s like, “I got cash, you got time, let’s roll!” Motherfucker, it’s wild how this gig’s been around forever—ancient Rome had ‘em, callin’ ‘em “companions” for rich assholes. Still happens now, just slicker, quieter, right under our noses.

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After that, I stroll down Ulica Stjepana Radića. It’s packed, as usual. People everywhere, chattin’, laughin’, livin’ their best lives. I’m just tryin’ to get to the market. But then, outta nowhere, this street performer starts doin’ some wild snake charmer act. I’m like, “Dude, I’m the Snake Spell here!” But I can’t help but watch. He’s got this huge python, and it’s slitherin’ all over him. I’m half impressed, half jealous.

BENZER, Ernie