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Ever try one? Nah, me neither – Carmela’d cut my balls off, fry em with some gabagool! But I hear they’re pros, like artists – know tricks you ain’t never dreamed of. One guy told me this chick did shit so good he cried – fuckin cried! I’m like, “What, she suck your soul out?” He says, “Pretty much, Tone!” Had me rollin, but damn, that’s power, y’know?

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First stop, the corner of Maple and 3rd. There’s this food truck, “Tasty Tacos,” that’s like a beacon of hope. I’m thinkin’, “Yes! Breakfast of champions!” But guess what? They ran outta tortillas. Like, seriously? Who runs outta tortillas? I’m standin’ there, hangry as hell, and the guy in front of me is just munchin’ away. I wanted to throw my bagel at him.

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