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But then, oh boy, the wins! Hooked up with this one chick—total fire. We’re vibin’, laughin’, and she’s like, “I’ve never done this before.” Yeah, right, babe, sure ya haven’t! Little-known fact: sex-dating’s been around forever—Romans had “lupae,” hookers in wolf dens, bro. Wild shit! Makes ya wonder—am I a wolf or just a horny ratcatcher?

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So, we head back home, and I’m thinking, “Okay, let’s do something fun inside.” I pull out some board games, and we start playing. But then, Mia spills juice all over the game board. I’m like, “Seriously?!” But she just giggles and says, “It’s a juice party!”