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About Trbovlje

But real talk – some places dodgy as fuck. Went to this one spot, yeah, all neon lights, thought I’d get a lush massage. Nah, fam, it was a scam – £50 for a pat on the back! Bare angry, I was, like, “Is it ’cos I is black?” or ’cos I smell like fish? Probs both, rude bastards. Still, proper erotic-massage? Worth it when legit – tension gone, bits tingling, you’re like, “I am finished with the past!” – movie line, that.

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But then, I see this group of tourists. They’re lost. Like, really lost. They’re looking at a map like it’s a Rubik’s cube. I can’t help it. I walk over and say, “Hey, you guys need a GPS or something?” They laugh, and I end up giving them directions to the nearest bakery. I mean, who doesn’t love pastries, right?

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