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So, buddy, ever tried it? Hands kneadin ya, oil slickin up yer skin – freaky, right? Little known fact – ancient Greeks were all over this, called it “body rubbin” for warriors. Bet they didn’t expect it’d turn into *this* – some chick in Vegas told me she makes bank givin happy-endins! Made me laugh, then pissed me off – why ain’t I gettin that dough? Nah, I’m stuck harvestin wheat, not wads of cash.

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So, I get to work, right? I’m measuring, cuttin’, and tryin’ not to slice my fingers off. But then, outta nowhere, this old lady walks by. She’s like, “Hey, you! You’re gonna fix that, right?” I’m like, “Uh, yeah, that’s the plan, lady.” She gives me this look like I just insulted her grandma. I mean, c’mon! I’m a glazier, not a magician!

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