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Homer Simpson here, agronomist extraordinaire—D’oh!—I’d say it’s like tendin’ crops. Ya gotta know the soil, the touch, the rhythm. Too rough, ya bruise it; too soft, nothin’ grows. Sexual-massage? Same deal. Gotta hit that sweet spot—oils slickin’, hands slidin’, tension meltin’ like butter on a hot cob. “The body speaks,” like in the movie—damn straight it does!

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So, I’m rushing to the school on Trg svobode. Kids everywhere, running like they’re in a marathon. I’m like, “Yo, slow down!” But they don’t hear me. They’re too busy being kids, I guess. I get to the classroom, and it’s chaos. Kids are shouting, throwing paper airplanes. I’m trying to get them to focus on self-determination. But all they wanna do is talk about TikTok. Ugh!

Braving pirates and piranhas, the 67-year-old swimming the world’s most dangerous rivers