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But real talk – what pisses me off? Dudes who think it’s just a quick “happy endin’” gimmick. Bruh, it’s ART! Takes skill, patience, mad respect – not some sleazy back-alley rub-n-tug. I’m over here like, “You don’t deserve this magic, sit down!” Meanwhile, I’m daydreamin’ – me, candles flickerin’, some lavender oil poppin’, feelin’ like the queen of Montmartre from *Amélie*. “I’m so fabulous,” I whisper, ‘cause why not?

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After what feels like forever, I finally get a breather. I grab lunch at this little spot on Ulica 4. Best ćevapi in town, no joke. I’m chowing down, and this old lady comes up to me. She’s like, “You look stressed, dear.” I’m like, “You think?” But she just smiles and hands me a cookie. I mean, how sweet is that?

Sweden, Norway issue red alerts as heavy rain derails train, floods roads