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Oh, and the STORIES—heard this one escort dude once had to tackle a fan who threw a SHOE at a celeb. A SHOE! I’d be hollerin’, “Who raised you?!” Shit’s bananas. Makes me wonder—what’s goin’ thru their heads? Prolly, “This job’s wild, but I’m the shit.” And they are! It’s bad bitch o’clock for them too!

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But then, something amazing happens. A couple of kids from the neighborhood come by. They’re all giggles and smiles, splashing in puddles. One of them, a little girl, looks up at me and says, “Mister, you’re like a superhero!” I’m like, “Me? Nah, I’m just a carpenter.” But it hit me. In that moment, I felt like I was doing something cool.

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