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About Velenje

We swears! Escort’s a wild ride, precious! Like, you think it’s all fancy cars, slick suits, yeah? Nah, mate, it’s gritty, it’s raw – proper “Spring Breakers” vibe! “Faith, we’re like, so pretty!” – that’s what they sell ya, all glitz, but peel it back, it’s dodgy deals, late nights, and shifty blokes. Me, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ – ooh, shiny escort life, but then – bam! – reality smacks ya. Worked with this geezer once, right, swore he escorted some MP’s mistress – dodgy as hell, made me chuckle. “Candy, we’re infinity, bitches!” – that’s the escort motto, innit? Always chasin’ that next gig, that next quid.

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So, I set up my little stand, and it’s going okay. I’m chatting with some locals, you know, the usual gossip about the weather and who’s dating who. Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, knocks over my kvas barrel! I’m like, “Noooo!” It spills everywhere. I’m furious. I mean, that’s like spilling gold, man!

Slovenia becomes full member of ESA