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Sometimes I wonder—would I do it? Nah, too short, too mouthy. I’d be like, “Pay me double, ya twat!” Prob get sacked. Escorts tho, they’re pros—smooth, clever, like Haku dodgin’ spells. “I’ve got a job to do,” they’d say, and off they go. Respect, man. Total respect.

Then, I get a call from a client. This guy, let’s call him Mr. Grumpy. He’s all like, “Why is my premium so high?” I’m thinking, “Maybe because you keep crashing your car, buddy!” But I just said, “Let’s go over it.” I mean, I gotta keep it professional, right?