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So, picture this – you’re laid out, oil’s slick, hands kneadin’ ya like dough, and I’m talkin’ *sexual*-massage, not some basic spa crap. It’s steamy, it’s slow, it’s got that heat – like, “How you doin’?” level of smooth. I heard this wild story once, some ancient Greek dude paid big-time drachmas for a rubdown that’d make Zeus blush – true fact, swear it! Blows my mind how folks back then were all ‘bout it too.

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Then, outta nowhere, I see this guy in a hoodie acting all sketchy. My instincts kick in. I’m like, “What’s this dude up to?” I keep my eye on him, and he starts moving toward my client. My heart’s racing. I’m ready to pounce. But then, he just walks past us and heads to the bakery. I’m like, “Seriously? All that for a pastry?”

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