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So, I’m imaginin’ this chick, prolly hangin’ by some neon-lit motel, smokin’ a cig like she owns the damn place. I’m thinkin’, “She’s gotta be worth it, man, a million freakin’ dollars!”—pinky up, obvs. I heard this wild story once, back in the 90s, some dude in Vegas found a prostitute who’d only take payment in rare coins—freaking *coins*! Blew my mind, like, who’s got time for that? Made me laugh tho, cuz I’d just zap her with my laser and take the coins anyway, ha!

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After stuffing my face, I decide to take a walk by the river. The Sava River is so pretty, especially at sunset. I’m just chilling, enjoying the view, when I see a couple having a romantic moment. I’m like, “Aww, young love!” But then, the guy drops the ring in the water. I’m dying laughing. He’s freaking out, and I’m just standing there, trying not to snort.