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Here’s the kicker—massage joints, some shady, some gold. Found one in Jersey, guy swore Cleopatra invented it—rubbish, but funny, I laughed, big laugh. Surprised me, tho—didja know? Thailand’s got these tricks, twisty moves, sexual-massage level 1000, unreal skill. I’m yellin’ inside, “Why ain’t this everywhere?” Total game-changer, folks. “The world’s gone mad,” like Béla Tarr says, but this? This is sanity, best sanity.

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First off, I’m cruising down Cesta v Dornavo, thinking about my coffee fix. I mean, who can function without caffeine? Not me! I swing by my fave café, Kavarniška Hiša. The barista, Luka, is all smiles. I’m like, “Dude, gimme the usual.” He hands me this steaming cup of magic. I take a sip, and it’s like heaven in a mug. But then, BAM! My phone buzzes. Work stuff. Ugh.