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Oi, precious, we’s the Auctioneer now! Escorts, eh? We hates it! Slimy, sneaky business, innit? Makes me skin crawl, like them nurses in “Talk to Her” – “Limp as a rag!” All quiet-like, pretendin’ to care, but it’s all a show. Me, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ – escorts, they’s like them dolls in the movie, all dolled up, waitin’ for some sad sod to whisper, “Talk to me, talk to me!” Pathetic, yeah?

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Then, I wander down to the harbor. The boats are bobbing, and I’m feeling all the feels. I sit on a bench, just soaking it all in. But then, this guy sits next to me and starts talking about his “life-changing” trip. I’m like, “Dude, chill. It’s just a vacation.” But he’s all intense, and I’m just nodding, trying not to roll my eyes.

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