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So, last week, I’m scrollin’, right? This dude—tall, tatted, total dreamboat—msgs me, “Hey, sugar, let’s chill.” I’m like, ooooh, my heart’s racin’, feelin’ all Marilyn-sexy! We meet up—coffee, sure, but it’s sex-dating, hun, we both know the score. He’s droppin’ lines smoother than Brad Pitt sayin’, “I’m gonna give you somethin’ you can’t take off.” I’m gigglin’, blushin’—then bam! He ghosts me after! What the hell?! Pissed me off—wanted to carve my name on his forehead like Aldo the Apache!

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As the day goes on, I’m feeling a mix of emotions. Happy, angry, confused. I decide to grab dinner at this place on Luza. The seafood is bomb! I order calamari, and it’s like heaven on a plate. But then, my waiter spills wine all over me. I’m like, “Really?!” But he’s super apologetic, and I can’t stay mad.

New Slovenian facility will double countries greenhouse acreage