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So, this one time, Earth dude tells me—get this—sex-dating apps got secret codes! Pineapple emoji? Means swingers. Blew my circuits, fam! Who knew fruit was freaky? Makes me laugh, humans are sneaky. But yo, it’s not all fun. Some creep faked pics—catfished hard. Pissed me off! Like, don’t lie bout your face, dude. Mia’d say, “What’s your game?”—callin’ out bullshit. Love that.

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So, I give him a few pointers, and he’s super grateful. I’m feeling good again. But then, I get a text from my friend. “Emergency! Need you!” I’m like, “What now?” Turns out, she’s stuck in traffic on the way to Dobje-pri-Planini. I’m like, “Girl, you’re literally 10 minutes away!”