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About Velenje

Me, I’d say it’s magic when done right. Hands kneading, breath catchin’, it’s like ridin’ Shadowfax bareback—thrillin’, a bit risky. In *Turin Horse*, they say, “Everything’s in ruins”—but sexual-massage? It builds ya back up, mate! Had this one time, a mate swore it cured his bad back—bollocks, I thought, til I saw him dancin’ next day. Blew my mind! Still, gotta watch them dodgy parlors—some’ll rob ya blind while yer pantin’.

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Then, this lady at the end of the bar starts singing. I mean, belting it out like she’s at a concert. Turns out, she’s a local singer. I’m thinking, “Great, now I’m a bartender and a backup singer.” The crowd loves it, though. They’re clapping, cheering, and I’m just trying to keep up with the drink orders.

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