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Lemme tell ya, I tried it once. Signed up, fat fingers typin’ “sexy Homer” —D’oh! Total disaster! Profile pic? Me with a donut, shirt off—thought it’d work. Nope! Got ghosted faster than Bart ditchin’ chores. Made me mad, like, “What, I ain’t hot?” But then, this chick messages—says she’s into “big bois.” Score! We chat, she’s all flirty, I’m sweatin’ like a pig—perfect for a swineherd, huh?

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First off, I hit the streets of Ajdovščina, right? I’m cruising down Cesta 1. maja, feeling all good. Sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be epic!” But then, boom! I trip over a loose cobblestone. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out like a starfish, and this old lady just stares at me. Like, c’mon, lady, help a dude out!

Race Report: SloEnduro 2023 Round 2, Ilirska Bistrica