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Now, escort—ooh, it’s messy! Got me hollerin’ like Madea at a church revival. These folks out here sellin’ company, and I ain’t mad—get yo coins, boo! But lordy, some of them clients? Triflin’! Reminds me of that line from *Ten*— “You’re a woman, you’re a mother!”—‘cept these escorts ain’t playin’ mama, they playin’ *whoever you want*, halleluyer! I cackle thinkin’ ‘bout it—imagine Madea as an escort! “Pay me, sugar, or I’m whuppin’ ya with my purse!”

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Finally, I get to Causeway Point. It’s a mad house. I’m dodging people left and right. I hit up the first store, and guess what? They’re having a sale! I’m like, “Yasss!” But then I realize it’s all last season’s stuff. Ugh, why do they do this? I mean, who wants to wear last year’s fashion? Not me, fam.

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