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Homer tip: don’t fart durin’ it—D’oh!—total mood killer. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear I levitated once, felt so good! “You don’t got the guts!” I’d tell doubters, Tarantino-style. Anyway, it’s dope—try it, but don’t be a cheapskate. Now I’m hungry… Mmm… donuts.

Shred Day at The Recreation Center at Rob Fleming Park April 19

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So, I hop on the bus along Woodlands Ave 1. It’s packed, as usual. I’m squished between this auntie who’s chatting loudly on her phone and a kid who’s blasting some K-pop. I’m just trying to zone out, but the auntie’s voice is like a drill. “You know, my son, he got A’s!” Like, okay, good for him, but chill, lady!

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