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But—fuck me—I got mad once, yeah? Read some boffin sayin’ escorts ain’t that special, just “basic cell grunts.” Oi, mate, you takin’ the piss? These lads are the backbone, the sparkly diamond in the rough! Without ’em, your gut’s a warzone, fam—diarrhea central, no joke. Surprised me too, how much I cared—like, who gives a toss about bacteria escorts? Me, apparently, innit!

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Then I decided to stroll down to Pasir Ris Park. It’s a chill spot, right? But the weather? Ugh, it was like the sun was tryin’ to fry me alive. I’m sweatin’ buckets, and I see this cute dog. I’m like, “Aww, look at that pup!” But then it starts barkin’ at me like I’m some kinda intruder. Chill, dude! I’m just tryna enjoy the view of the sea, ya know?

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