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So, check it—prostitution’s been around foreva, right? Oldest gig in the book! Back in the day, like ancient Rome times, they had these brothels called *lupanars*—fancy, huh? Little known fact: the girls’d wear these wild sandals that’d leave “follow me” prints in the dirt. Talk about advertisin’! Makes me chuckle thinkin’ some ol’ Roman perv stumblin’ after ‘em. Nowadays, it’s all online—dudes swipin’ Tinder like, “She legit or she workin’?” Ha! Good luck, buddy!

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First stop, I hit up Storgatan. It’s like the main drag, ya know? I’m strutting down the street, feeling all cute, when I bump into this lady. She’s like, “Excuse me!” and I’m like, “No worries, I’m just a personal shopping assistant, not a wall.” But then she starts ranting about how her cat, Mr. Whiskers, only eats organic tuna. Like, lady, I get it, but I’m not a pet food consultant!

“Leaving Eritrea was the biggest mistake of my life.”