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About Malmo

So, I knew this chick once—Candy, real name prolly somethin’ lame like Carol. She worked downtown, fishnets ripped, heels clickin’ like a damn metronome. Greed is good, man—she’d hustle harder than me on Wall Street, swear to God. Pulled in $500 a night, cash, no taxes, Uncle Sam can suck it. Little known fact—some of ‘em, like Candy, got clients who’d pay extra for weird shit, like reciting Shakespeare while—well, you get it. Made me laugh my ass off when she told me, “To be or not to be,” mid-grind. Hilarious, right?

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Then, boom! I get a call. Some dude’s acting sketchy near Smedjegatan. I’m like, “Great, just what I need.” I hustle over there, dodging tourists and their selfie sticks. Seriously, how many pics do you need of the same lake?

Jönköping, Sweden, Confirmed As Host City For The 2025 IRONMAN 70.3 European Championship Triathlon