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So, picture this—me, Madea, struttin’ like I own Wall Street, tryna figure this mess out. I’m thinkin’, “This some high-class nonsense right here!” You got girls postin’ ads online, slick as Jordan Belfort sellin’ stocks. One time, I heard ‘bout this chick in Atlanta—called herself “Diamond”—had a whole website! Reviews and all, like she a dang Yelp restaurant! I hollered, “Halleluyer! She got five stars for what?!” Made me madder than a wet hen—why folks out here ratin’ THAT? But I was impressed too, gotta admit. She was hustlin’ harder than Belfort snortin’—you know what—off a table!

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After the coffee fiasco, I decide to check out the beach. Bunkeflostrand beach is gorgeous! The sun is shining, and the water looks inviting. I’m thinking, “Why didn’t I bring my swimsuit?” Classic me. I sit on the sand, and it’s like, “Ahh, this is the life.” But then, I see a seagull eyeing my bag. I swear, those birds are like ninjas. One second, they’re chilling, and the next, they’re swooping in for your fries.

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