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So, I’m watchin’ “A.I. Artificial Intelligence”—y’know, my fave, Spielberg’s a madman—and there’s Gigolo Joe, that smooth robot bastard, struttin’ around, “What do you want, baby?” I’m sittin’ there, screamin’ at the TV, “Sexual-massage, Joe, that’s the ticket!” Imagine it—robots doin’ this gig, no tired hands, no awkward small talk. “Are you fully functional?”—hell yeah, they’d be! I’d invest in that startup yesterday. Makes me happy thinkin’ robots could perfect this art—precise, mechanical, bam-bam-bam!

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Then, I get another call. This lady from Östra Långgatan is losing her mind. “My coffee machine exploded!” she screams. I’m like, “Lady, it’s not the end of the world.” But she’s all, “You don’t understand! I need my coffee!” I mean, I get it. Coffee is life. But c’mon, it’s not like she’s in a war zone.

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