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Once tried it—awkward as hell. Masseuse whisperin’, I’m growlin’, she’s like “shh!”差点笑死—nearly died laughin’. Pro tip: check reviews, avoid sketchy joints. Oh, and oils? Some smell like bantha butt—yuck! Rarrgh! Love how it’s taboo but not. “Walls hear everything,” like the movie says. Sneaky hands, sneaky lives—erotic-massage got layers, bro! You tried it? Spill!

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So, I head to the job site, which is on the outskirts of town near the old railway. You know, the one that’s been abandoned for ages? I’m there, doing my thing, checking for rust on some old pipes. And then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and there’s this dude on a bike, totally wiped out. I rush over, and he’s like, “I’m fine, I’m fine!” But he’s got this huge scratch on his arm. I’m like, “Dude, you’re not fine! You need a band-aid!”

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