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I ain’t judgin’, tho—live how you live! It’s just them hands, that oil, slidin’ ‘round, makin’ you forget your name. Kinda like when Kolya in the movie’s drownin’ in vodka—numb but alive! I’d prolly try it, but I’d sass the masseuse—“Don’t you skimp on that oil, boo!” Halleluyer! It’s freaky, it’s fun, it’s a lil’ sinful—perfect for a Southern gal like me who’s seen it all! Now, who’s got the guts to book it? Tell Madea how it goes!

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After that, I’m walking down Östra Långgatan, trying to clear my head. I pass by this bakery, and the smell hits me like a freight train. I can’t resist. I go in, and they have these pastries that look like they’re straight outta heaven. I grab one, and it’s like a party in my mouth. But then, I realize I’ve got crumbs all over my shirt. Great, now I look like a mess.

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