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So, erotic-massage—lowkey a freaky art, fam! Not just some backrub, nah, it’s history deep—ancient Greeks were on it, rubbin’ down athletes, callin’ it “massage with benefits,” ya feel? Then Rome flipped it, made it all sensual—orgy vibes, oil everywhere, chaotic as ME! I’m screamin’, “LET’S GET WEIRD!” while some dude’s tryna pay for gum. Little known fact: Japan’s got this “nurumassage,” slimey as hell, seaweed gel slidin’—sounds like a Coen brothers fever dream, I’m shook!

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But then, something unexpected happened. I bumped into an old friend, Lisa! We hadn’t seen each other in ages. We started chatting, and I totally forgot about the chaos around us. We laughed about old times, like that one time we got lost in the woods near Simrislund. Classic us.

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