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Yo, what’s good, fam? Let’s talk escort—yep, *that* escort gig! Like, the profession where you’re sellin’ vibes, not just time, ya feel me? I’m Eric Andre, chaotic absurdity king, spillin’ the tea on this wild hustle. It’s like *Inception*—a dream in a dream, but with cash and heels! “You mustn’t be afraid to dream a lil bigger, darling!”—that’s what I’d tell these escorts, ‘cause damn, they’re out here architectin’ fantasies!

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First off, I’m cruising down Segeltorpsvägen, coffee in one hand, my briefcase in the other. I’m thinking, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Ha! Yeah, right. I hit that roundabout by the Segeltorp Centrum, and boom! Traffic jam. Like, what’s the deal? It’s not rush hour! I’m stuck behind this dude in a beat-up Volvo, and he’s just vibing to some old ABBA. I’m like, “Bro, it’s 2023, not 1973!”

Carl Hagelin: “I Did Everything I Could To Come Back And I Feel At Peace That Way”