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Little fact for ya: back in ‘90s, sex-dating was all secret ads in papers. “Man seeks woman, no fatties”—savage! Now it’s apps, boom, instant nudes. Progress? Pfft, still a cesspit, just shinier. We hates it! All them ghostin’ pricks—swear, one bloke left me hangin’ mid-sext. Rude! Wanted to scream, “Where’s me precious climax?!”

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After that, I headed over to the park by the old train station. You know, the one where all the kids hang out? I was just chilling on a bench, scrolling through my phone, when I overheard this group of teens talking about some wild party later. I mean, I’m not that old, but I felt ancient. They were all hyped about it, and I was like, “Dude, I just wanna go home and binge-watch Netflix.”

Agencies list Sweden's safest places