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Oy, listen up, ya little minions! Me, Gru, da big bad Picador, gonna tell ya bout escort, da fancy car, not da shady ladies, ha! Lightbulb! Dis Ford Escort, she’s a sneaky one, like Chow Yun-Fat flyin’ thru bamboo in “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon”—my fave, ya know, dat flick from 2000, Ang Lee, pure genius! Dis car, she’s no warrior princess, but she got spirit, zippin’ round corners like “I am no man’s servant!”—dat’s from da movie, heh, love dat line.
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Then, I spot my buddy Erik. He’s the kind of guy who thinks he’s a beach god. He’s flexing, showing off his “gains” (which are mostly just a good tan). We start chatting, and he’s like, “Dude, you gotta try this new smoothie place on Långgatan.” I’m like, “Sure, why not?”
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